BIRTH VEG - HUMPER BEAN

‘Humpers’ have smooth pale skin, hairless arms, a tendency to flabby folds round the chin, a propensity for trapped wind and itchiness. Interests are likely to include shimmying, stroking smooth-furred animals, a keen eye for boots or high shoes, and a lack of sympathy for others. Key colours: grey or off-grey. Birthsound: ‘Ooooch’.