HISTROPHY - THE HAIR EPOCH

THE HAIR EPOCH Who hasn't looked in a reflective surface and wondered exactly where their back-combed triple-layer fringe-fall originated? Who, when passing a chalet window, hasn't caught sight of their rolltop-plaitweave-sidelevel and conjectured as to its precise histrophy? If one could turn back the tide-time monitors several thousand cycles (don't try this, it doesn't work) and stare back into the fug of the olden days (there were many more noxious emissions then, long before the introduction of proper filters), through all the steam of supposition (condensation caused by academic nostril-push), then it would be fascinating to return to the primitive salons of yesterpast and take a backseat (a rude construction of wood and turf) to watch the ancient hair-priests at work. Fropessor Gerrit Obersh of The Jinsy Institute For Forgotten Details: "Do I speak into this microphone? Oh, you're already recording. Right. So I just talk, do I? Incidentally what type of microphone is that - an SNJ58? I haven't seen one of those before. The girl who came last time had a V7. It's much smaller but better for fieldwork, she said. Mind that trench incidentally. I tripped in it earlier, when I arrived at the dig. - Ooh, did Jerevy offer you some tea? There's a flask somewhere. Should still be warm. It's hemp-insulated. Great for really cold mornings when you can't feel your fingers. That's the downside of this job, actually; the early mornings and the unremitting mud and frost. And the boring company of other academicians going on and on about pottery shards and reconstructed tongs. That Linder Forpson is the worst. If I have to hear about low-level sifting with a hand trowel one more time! - Ah, here's Jerevy. - Jerevy is there any tea left? - No, not that one. The hemp-backed one. Should that light be flashing on the battery? It looks like it's about to - "